They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as running eight miles. Who the hell runs eight miles in 30 seconds?🤣

Let’s play carpenter! First, we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.😈😂

What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? "If we don't get some support, people will think we're nuts 🤣

Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.😈😏

How is playing bridge similar to sex? If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

What’s the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker could wash her crack and resell it.😂

What’s still together after all the sh*t they’ve been through? Your butt cheeks. 😁😁

I like your outfit :)

What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say to clients as they’re leaving? Thanks for coming! 💦😂

Do you need a carpenter? Because I could nail you then hammer you 😈🔥

What’s the difference between you and the refrigerator? The refrigerator doesn’t moan when I put my meat in i

What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird 😁😁😁

What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me. 😂😂

What has 148 teeth and holding back a monster? My zipper 🤣🤣

Why does a woman prefer an old gynecologist over a new one? Because the old one has shaky hands